I've been interviewing a lot of people lately who are following their passion. Whose careers are their life's passion, and I keep asking them: why do they do what they do? And I keep getting the same answers: "Because it's my passion."
And then I got to thinking, and wondering, what exactly does that mean? I mean, my passion is writing -- but where did that come from? It's not like I just woke up one morning thinking, A-ha! (--wait, no, lemme use my new favorite expression instead:) Yahtzee! Writing is my passion!
If we're all a sum of our experiences, I suppose my question really should be: what experiences have added up to make, and create, your passion? What have you done, felt, seen and lived, that's made you decide that this particular field is your passion?
But, if I'm going to be going around asking people a question that deep and personal, mayhaps I oughta start by answering it myself.
Why do I write? How do I know that writing is my passion?
Hmm... it was a long time ago... very far away... Not really. It was high school, and I was still in the same city (Miami). There was this band (--doesn't that sound like the beginning of a story full of drugs and debauchery?! Ah, well, not.), called Reel Big Fish. You may have heard of 'em... about ten years ago. They had a few hits, and were very cute and funny and cute, and I, along with my best friend at the time, really, really liked 'em.
Their contribution to the record was a cover of A-Ha's Take On Me. But what caught our (me and my best friend at the time's) eye -- and attention, and tickled our funny bone, and totally jazzed us up -- was the cover. Was this funny, cute, Tiger Beat rip-off cover from this cute and funny and cute and really great band.
Sooooo, being teenagers, with little-to-no-shame, lots of free time, and a seemingly (at the time) endless supply of Kool-Aid (not some sort of drug euphemism -- real, sugar-high-inducing, stain-your-tongue-if-you-drink-too-much-of-it, Kool Aid Man bursting through the wall, Fruit Punch flavored Kool-Aid), we decided that we wanted to hang out with them, and get to know them, and be best friends forever with them (and totally not in a groupie kind of way either!).
What could we do though? How could two cute girls from Miami get their attention, without going all flashy and super-ho? How about funny and clever? How about... if we create a 'zine? ...all about Reel Big Fish? ...and we make it just like the cover of their single?!
Thus was born: TeenBeef (name later changed to TeenBeaf, when we no longer wanted the RBF association).
They were grand times, the TeenBeef/TeenBeaf years! 'Twas laughter, and free shows, and going backstage (sans groupie-ness I tells you!!), and press passes, and fame (in the form of actually being recognized by a random, unknown-to-us-beforehand girl in the bathroom of one particular show, who looked at us and said, "Hey, aren't you those TeenBeaf girls?" ((this was post wanting to distance ourselves from the RBF-ness of it all)).
As Reel Big Fish was a ska/punk band, and we really liked the ska/punk scene/music/vibe, that was our target audience. Our deadlines tended to be "the next big show." meaning a concert/show of any of a handful of our really super favorite bands -- such as Reel Big Fish, Spring Heeled Jack USA, and The Aquabats.
We'd send shamelessly silly letters (remember those?) to the PR people for the bands we liked, and they indulged our silliness and fun, and would grant us interviews, and backstage passes, and free entry -- got into three different Warped Tours that way -- into all the shows we wanted to get into.
We succeeded in attracting the attention of the Reel Big Fish-ers, and spent a still-to-this-day hi-larious few hours "interviewing" The Aquabats -- though really, it was more just trying not to eject all the snot out of our noses while laughing so hard our stomachs hurt. We got "fan mail" from the very awesome, ultra rad, classiest and coolest of bassists for Spring Heeled Jack USA; and more than anything, we had FUN!!
All caps, italicized, with exclamation points, ridiculous, shameless, silly, no holds barred (and still no groupie action!) FUN!!
The best moments were the ones where BFATT and I would sit in front of the computer, or at a table, gluing and taping all the pieces together, writing stories, making ourselves laugh until the snot came flying out of our noses. Pushing ourselves further each time, taking silly pictures, finding the silliest, most random things we could so we could include them in the magazine. Such as:
- R.A.D.D. -- Rockstars Against Do-It-Yourself Dentistry
- Continuously mentioning our long-suffering staff, only to reveal later that our staff was actually a dude by the name of Staffardo, who (insider knowledge!) was my BFATT's brother, who we bribed with a Prince record to allow us to take a picture of him (only one) that we totally messed up on and managed to cut his head off in. We used it anyway, writing "I'm gay for Sugar Ray" on it, and sticking it over every other picture we could find! -- the sillier, stupider and more nonsensical the ideas, the better. The only mandate was FUN!!!
This was the moment my passion was born.
Ever afterward, in college, when people asked me what I wanted to do, I said that I wanted to start my own magazine. After that I said that I wanted to be a writer. And now, I write.
The fun's not the same -- and honestly, it seems like at least three-quarters of the challenge these days is to recapture the gleeful, unabashed FUN!! of those days -- but it's what keeps me going. What lets me know that this sometimes difficult, sometimes rewarding, sometimes lonely, sometimes lovely career is the one for me. Because if that kind of FUN!! exists in this world? And I had the privilege, and honor, of experiencing even one iota of it? Well, then, there's just no other option. I'm like an addict, and I gotta have more.
Or, put another way, I guess you could say: it's my passion.
We are TeenBeaf
(Plus official TB mascot, George!)
((and Olaf -- the Fish))
:) xo